I took a hiatus from posting the last few months. I can’t really speculate on why, but I did, so there you have it.
I’ve been busy. Busy in a different way. I’ve been purging junk and excess responsibilities from my life. It’s been emotionally draining, physically draining. We’re moving to a small, adorable little house and I’ve been throwing things away, literally. Old things. Things I don’t need. Things I don’t use. Things I didn’t even know I had.
I’ve been shedding excess responsibilities. Projects I don’t have time for. Being honest with my own limitations is extremely liberating. It’s been helpful to consciously pick what I want to deal with now, instead of just thinking I can do 100% of the things all of the time. Because frankly, I can’t, and it’s unfair to myself to think I can. That’s a breath of fresh air.
I’ve been hiking. I’ve been finally doing things my soul loves, and doing those things frequently. I have been training my horse, hiked four times last week, pushups and pullups and walking and photographing and working on my classroom and kissing my husband and putting my energy into being a mother. I’ve been feeding my soul.
I’ve been trying to pick the things that feed my soul and shedding the things that don’t. Consciously losing baggage. Consciously choosing what makes me feel better.
I’m working on making me happy instead of whimpering over the things I can’t control, the things in the past, the things I can’t put energy into anymore. I’ve been trying to find my Self in a different way and it seems to be working.
I’m me. I’m overextended no matter what. But I’m figuring out how to be overextended without crushing myself.